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The Asylum

Welcome to the Asylum. This is a site devoted to politics and current events in America, and around the globe. The THREE lunatics posting here are unabashed conservatives that go after the liberal lies and deceit prevalent in the debate of the day. We'd like to add that the views expressed here do not reflect the views of other inmates, nor were any inmates harmed in the creation of this site.

Location: Mesa, Arizona, United States

Who are we? We're a married couple who has a passion for politics and current events. That's what this site is about. If you read us, you know what we stand for.

Thursday, April 14, 2005

16 Ways To Maintain Insanity

A co-worker handed me this today, after hearing me talk about this site. After reading it, I could not quit laughing about it. In my opinion, these should be common practices for many people just trying to get a little more out of life.

#1: At lunchtime, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

#2: Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.

#3: Put your trash can on your desk, and label it your "in box".

#4: Put decaf in the coffee maker at work for three weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffiene habit, switch to espresso.

#5: Finish all your sentences with "in accordance with the Prophecy".

#6: Dont use any punctuation

#7: As often as you possibly can, skip rather than walk.

#8: Specify that your drive-through order is "to go".

#9: Sing along at the opera.

#10: Go to a poetry reading and ask why the poems don't rhyme.

#11: Put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical sounds all day.

#12: Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you're not in the mood.

#13: Have your co-workers address you by your wrestling name "Rock Hard".

#14: When your money comes out of the ATM, scream "I won! I won!"

#15: When leaving the zoo, start running toward the parking lot, yelling "Run for your lives, they're loose!"

#16: Tell your children over dinner, "Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go."

The Bunny ;)


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